Goat Soap

"Is the goat soap antibacterial?"

What does that even mean? What is goat soap? Is it to wash a goat? Is it made of goat parts (yuck)? If you're washing a goat, do you really need anything to be antibacterial, because I kind of feel like that ship has sailed for you if you are, in fact, washing a goat. Or using soap made of goat parts.

I was at the supermarket an hour ago and the checkout clerk yelled that query to another clerk, trying (I assume) to get clarification for a customer regarding the efficacy of the goat soap.

I feel like I should just leave this right here, just stop now, because I'm not sure I can adequately expound upon how that opening question reflects our coronavirus-driven lives at present. But you know me (probably). I'm going to try anyway.

Let's just start with the 800 pound gorilla and get that out of the way so we can move on to more pressing issues. Goat soap. What? Why? Who? How?

Ok. On to coronavirus, and how it has turned people into... I don't want to say idiots because that sounds super judgy, but also it might be kind of accurate, because in my supermarket this morning someone was trying to buy antibacterial goat soap.

Also, I walked down the cleaning aisle to look for Clorox disinfectant wipes, and there were only five containers of them left. There was zero Purell, or any other brand of hand sanitizer. Paper towels were running low. I actually think this is all good--it means people are paying attention and trying to do what they can to limit their exposure. But it also made me wonder, why isn't there ALWAYS a run on Clorox wipes and hand sanitizer? Because this situation right now makes me seriously think that nobody is wiping down their surfaces or cleaning their hands unless there's a life-threatening virus on the prowl. No bueno.

And I also want to know what ELSE (besides hands/surfaces) we are all doing in our everyday lives to combat this? I guess even more paramount in my mind is what are we all going to CONTINUE to do, even after this virus has subsided and we have a vaccine, which should be next week, I believe, according to our president, so also let's not get all worked up about this because this virus is "contained" already, even without people being tested and without us knowing who has it, and the testing kits are "beautiful", so that's helpful and should end the pandemic right there. Words to live by.

Sorry. Frustration, disguised as sarcasm, poking its head through there. Back to what is really on my mind: moving forward and living in a mindful way that minimizes the chances of getting sick. I'm sure we can't avoid pandemics. But I'm also sure we CAN lessen their impact.

Ever the problem solver, here are some thoughts from me, Kim Traversi, absolutely not a medical doctor of any kind, with zero training in epidemiology or even any actual knowledge gained by reading good source material on any of this kind of stuff. This is the ONLY thing I have in common with our president--we both have an absolute lack of expertise on any of this, and yet we are still going to advise you how to proceed. I present for your consideration:

1. Stop shaking hands when you meet people. Ever. Just don't. This is a habit that we need to replace with a nice hand-to-the-heart and a slight bow of respect.
2. Cough into your sleeve. Even when there's no coronavirus--cough into your sleeve. Anywhere else is just gross.
3. Don't share chapsticks. Ever.
4. Catholic church: no more shared chalice of wine that you let everyone drink from because you think it's ok because you wipe the chalice in between sips. No. No. No.
5. Wash your hands when you come into your house. Wash your hands before you eat. Wash your hands after you eat. Wash your hands before you come into a situation where people are gathering. Wash your hands when you leave. You get the idea.
6. Please, for the love of god, turn away from people when you sneeze. I mean come on. It shouldn't take coronavirus for that to happen.
7. Hold your breath on elevators. Kidding.
8. Can we all agree that communal dishes of party foods should not exist? I mean they should not exist at all, forevermore. No more bowls of popcorn or nuts waiting for you at the bar, because eeeew, you have no idea whose hand was in that before you arrived. No more bowls of M&M's at parties. I'm not sure what to do about the potato chip situation. I feel like I could be an industry-killer with this one. Can we establish a blue-ribbon committee on proper chip display/consumption methods?

I guess what I'm seeing right now is panic-driven behaviors (such as use of hand sanitizer and hand washing) that are spurred by very real concerns about getting sick, when these behaviors should be present realistically in our daily lives regardless of whether there's a current panic/pandemic.

I have a sinking feeling that when this all starts to fade, the only thing we will have learned is that excessive use of Purell makes your hands really dry. And that there is goat soap, which may or may not be antibacterial.